ately I've noticed that a lot of people seem to be afraid of food. They're afraid of overeating, eating the wrong thing, or eating something that could negatively affect their health. This could only happen in a rich, developed nation like ours where food is constantly and widely available. Our national food obsession has led to eating ambivalence, where people will do things like religiously avoid bread and bread products for fear of getting fat, but they have no problem devouring an entire plate of French fries on their own. You know there has to be mass confusion when all bread is the enemy and trans fat-laden fries are a better alternative. I have even dined with people who tell me that they avoid all processed sugar and then proceed to pour packets of processed artificial sweeteners over their food and into their drinks.

On a basic level, food is everything: life, comfort, nourishment, family, connection, desire, memory, history, health, disease, entertainment, power, conflict, art, fashion, and so on. Why do you eat? Go ahead and list the reasons right now. I bet that the answer "to live" is at the bottom of your list of reasons-if it's on there at all! That's how disconnected we are with our food, that the most basic reason for eating does not enter our minds, even though we obsess about food all day long.

I can tell you countless stories of educated, intelligent people who live in fear of what they think food will do to their bodies and their health. I can't say I fault them for being misinformed or confused. Every time I watch television, open a magazine, or walk down the cereal aisle in the supermarket, I'm grateful that I'm a dietitian . It seems unfair that you should need an advanced degree in nutrition in order to eat healthfully, but unless you avoid or ignore most media claims and all advertising (including subliminal advertising in television shows and movies), you need to have a strong foundation in basic nutrition principles. People are bombarded with so much nutrition information from so many different sources that food becomes this scary unknown entity that has the power to cause disease or make you fat or kill you or, conversely, cure all that ails you.

America's relatively brief history with food evidences the steadily evolving depersonalization of food, a philosophy that began with the industrial revolution and continues to this day. Almost all aspects of understanding, preparing and eating foods have been taken out of our hands. In order to eat right, the message goes, we need the help of food and nutrition experts and modern technology. Well, have you noticed how everyone is a nutrition expert lately? In the last week, I've had at least three Gelson's shoppers tell me that we should not be eating fresh corn because it has way too much sugar (yeah, fresh corn is the reason why 60% of the country is overweight!). And isn't a processed protein bar the ultimate in nutrition? You would think so if you believe all the advertisements you read in magazines and see on television.

People are educating themselves by reading books such as Eat Right for your Blood Type, which have absolutely no scientific basis, taking the information to be gospel and following it religiously (at least until the next book/fad comes along). I can't say I really blame consumers when, in this information age, laymen are offered up all of the latest scientific findings about food and health, regardless of their validity, only to learn days or weeks later that a new study has contradicted the one they had just heard about. Perhaps more relevant are people who became interested in food and health in the 1980's and retain their lingering fear of all fat in their food, continuing to passionately avoid all high-fat foods, even avocados. A diet book or health guru who offers up lists of foods that people should avoid (along with the mechanisms that lead them to cause poor health) is welcome information for people who want to be thin and healthy but can't sort out all the information on their own.

I know you want to be healthy and choose the right foods-it's so satisfying to feel like you're eating the right foods. Now is the right time for food to stop being the enemy and start being a source of pleasure and satisfaction. It's time to turn our disordered eating into intelligent and healthy eating.

Reconnecting with our food will not be easy. I think it should start with a collective brain dump. Just close your eyes and breathe deeply. Visualize all of those lists of forbidden and allowed foods floating out of your head. Just let them go and release the fears that you connect with them as you exhale. Don't you feel like you've just lost ten pounds?

Now open your mind to the simple principle of selecting healthy, wholesome foods. Every time you eat you have choices. It is up to you to choose the least processed, most balanced foods that are available and in appropriate quantities. The following are the simple principles you need to remember when eating healthfully:

• Produce: All vegetables and fruits promote health. In fact, you need to eat about five cups of produce each day in order to achieve and maintain good health. Variety and color are important to include, too-you can't eat three bananas and think that you've satisfied your fruit requirements, so try a colorful fresh fruit salad instead. Understand that tomatoes, corn, and carrots are not the reason why anyone is overweight, and they supply vital nutrients to our bodies.

• Whole Grains: Whole grains are unprocessed, filling, and provide long-lasting energy to our bodies by helping to control our blood sugar. When choosing carbohydrates, opt for whole-grain breads, pastas, and cereals, brown rice, and other whole grains, like barley and quinoa. Remember that a serving is a half cup of cooked grains and one ounce of bread or cereal.

• Lean Proteins: Protein is important for balancing out meals to help our feeling of fullness last longer. As a society, we tend to over-emphasize the importance of protein. Please seek out lean animal proteins, such as a variety of fish and seafood, wild salmon, organic poultry, and lean cuts of natural meats. A serving of animal protein is three to four ounces. There are many nutrient-rich plant proteins that we often overlook, such as beans (kidney beans have more antioxidants than blueberries), soy, nuts, and seeds. Eggs and nonfat dairy products are good sources of protein as well. Keep protein portions in check and include a variety, especially of plant proteins.

• Healthy Fats: Fats are essential to our health. Some fats can promote health while others can diminish it. Organic olive oil should be your fat of choice. If you need to cook with high heat or bake, then organic canola oil should be your second choice. Fatty foods that you should include are avocado, nuts, flax seeds, wild salmon, tuna, mackerel, and black cod. Avoid partially hydrogenated oils, also known as trans fats, that are found in margarine and most processed foods (which you should be avoiding anyway). Limit saturated fats from fatty meats, butter, and fatty dairy products. Deep-fried foods, like French fries, do not contain healthy fats.

• Mindfulness: Listen to your body. Eat when you are hungry and stop when you are full. This will take a lot of work because it requires really getting in touch with your body and listening to it each moment, while doing away with your self-judgments and rationalizations. Learn to dislike the physical feeling of over-feeding yourself. Take the time to savor every aspect of your meals: the colors, aromas, textures, and flavors (this will require turning off the television).

• Balance: Balance out your meals. Include at least two servings of produce, one serving of whole grains, one serving of protein, and a little bit of healthy fat at each meal. This is the best way to minimize your calorie intake and maximize your feelings of fullness and energy.

• Honor: Honor yourself and honor your food. Respect your body's needs and attempt to only put the highest quality, most thoughtfully prepared foods into it. You'll be surprised by how your little aches and pains disappear and your mind will be clearer. Feed yourself with love and respect, not fear or judgment, and you will see how easy it can be to achieve the weight and health that you desire.

To celebrate your new outlook on eating, hold a dinner party for family and friends. Use the healthful principles you've just rediscovered to plan your menu. Do not cater to your guests' dietary restrictions of no processed sugars or starchy vegetables. Use fat in your salad dressing. Offer only water and wine to drink-no sodas. Cooking and eating with others are important ways to bring the sensuality, pleasure and connection back to our eating. A mindful, new and open approach will help you make friends with your food again.